Every one of us will go through life adding memories, experiences, and events that shape us as humans. Have you ever wondered why some random, seemingly insignificant memories linger…while we forget what we had for breakfast? I was playing golf with a buddy a couple of days ago and I recognized another golfer in the group behind us. I knew that he was a retired state trooper, but I couldn’t come up with his name for the life of me. It took me a couple of holes and a deep dive into my memory bank, but I finally managed to scrounge up his name. This was a guy that I worked with often over the years, but his name was a blank slate. I didn’t think that I was losing my mind, but it did get my wheels spinning.
The longer we live, the more people we meet. That should be true of all of us, but I am convinced that the human mind can only hold and manage so many images and names. Unless there is something unique or interesting about a person, perhaps we just go through the motions without any intention of remembering the encounter or the person themselves? Faces can look familiar, but putting a name with it can be daunting and frustrating. Sometimes we simply walk the other way and ignore the person because that would make it a lot less awkward for all involved. Sometimes we just say, “Hey”, and hope that something they say will jog our memory, but that can be a long shot!
The mind is a fascinating thing and it can play tricks on us. It can remember things we’d like to forget, and forget the things that we’d like to remember. I still remember being in middle school and performing a blocking drill against Jeff Gouzie. I somehow knocked him on his backside and the coach praised me in front of the entire team. I was too skinny for football and that may have been the highlight of my brief football career…because why else would I remember such a minor event in a lifetime that has spanned almost 60 years? I clearly remember the block, but don’t ask me who the coach was, or even what position that I played!
In 2004 I had the unpleasant experience of having a man take his own life while I was standing inches from him. I will be forever grateful that he decided to take his life instead of mine, but why do I remember everything about the incident, frame by frame, except what he looked like? I remember his name, what he was wearing, and the conversation that we had, but I have no memory of what he looked like.
I encourage you to think back to some good and bad times and try to remember even the smallest of details. You may be surprised by what you’re missing and what you’re not. So many people enter our lives, some only for minutes, but the mind decides which will be memorable and which ones will fade into obscurity. You have the ability to be that person that others remember due to a kind word or gesture. Sometimes the smallest, seemingly insignificant act will be remember for a lifetime…you just never know.
It has been said that memories never fade or go away, but that simply isn’t true. Most of us know people who have spent a lifetime acquiring memories only to have them snatched away by Alzheimer’s Disease. It is debilitating and sad to witness, but I have to believe that the memories are still there…fighting to come out. Feel free to challenge your mind and keep it as sharp as possible for as long as you can. Having said that, remember that your mind just might have a mind of its own, so just go with it.
