Every now and then an individual enters your life and you just know that they’re special. You can’t put your finger on it, but they possess traits that draw you to them. They aren’t superheroes and they’re just humans, but they have certain traits that you aspire to possess yourself. Perhaps it is their openness, vulnerability, or sincere kindness that makes them rise to the top? Having said that, people like this are not necessarily great, or even good leaders…just good people.
I met Trevor Maxwell when he was reporter for a local newspaper in Portland, Maine, sometime around 2007. He was that guy sitting quietly in the rear of a courtroom taking notes during a trial, or calling me to get scoop on a high profile case that he was reporting on. I seldom spoke to the press as the detective supervisor of a local police department because I found that they often twisted my words and used the least flattering quote that I spewed out. Trevor was an exception to that rule. He wasn’t pushy and he respected the position that I was in while investigating serious crimes. I made a living out of judging and testing people, and I did the same with Trevor. I discovered in short order that Trevor was a man of his word and that quality meant a lot to me…and still does.
When I decided to write my own book a few years later, it was Trevor that I called. He had never written a book, but he agreed to help me take my words and stories and turn them into something people might want to read. I was impressed with his patience and professionalism from the start. While we never became best friends, we did get to know and appreciate each other during the journey of finishing the book.
We didn’t talk often once the book was finished, but I never felt that we had to. He was like an old high school buddy and it was as if we had just spoken, even if months or years had passed. He knew how I felt about him and I knew how he felt about me. I dare say that mutual respect would define our friendship.
It was sometime in 2019 when Trevor and I connected again and decided to grab lunch. I knew that Trevor had been sick, but I didn’t know the details, nor did I ask. He could tell me what he wanted to tell me when he wanted to. It was during this lunch that Trevor told me that he had been diagnosed with colon cancer. He was so young and it was the last thing that I wanted to hear. He had a wife and two young daughters that he adored, and he was in the prime of his life. I listened while Trevor talked. He explained that he had been in a dark place, but he had finally seen the light. He told me that he was going to form a support group to help men who had been diagnosed with cancer. Despite his illness, Trevor had a spark in his eyes and I had a feeling he would take his newfound passion and put it to work.
Trevor Maxwell was not what I would call an exceptional leader when I first met him. Good guy, yes…leader, not so much. He has taken a bad situation and turned it into a phenomenal success. He has become the epitome of a leader and his goal is to help men who have cancer as well as their caregivers. Man Up To Cancer was launched in January 2020 and there are now hundreds, if not thousands of members across the globe. This group is designed to share information, form bonds, dissolve isolation, and create empowerment. If that isn’t a noble goal for a leader, I don’t know what is.
Trevor recently wrote his own book after years of fighting cancer. Open Heart/Warrior Spirit, A Man’s Guide To Living With Cancer is available now. I am so proud of my friend for fighting and clawing every day, while leading the charge for others who may need help and understanding. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to drive on despite it. I can’t encourage you enough to purchase this book. It is an honest and gut wrenching story of one man and his desire to live, love, and learn as long as possible. I couldn’t put my finger on what made Trevor special when I first met him, but I sure can now. If we have a breath left, we have hope!
Excellent story and examples of how one person can have such an impact on others.