Harry

A Friend Like Harry

Harry Nelson was born in Collins, Mississippi in 1950 and was raised by his mother in a small house. They were not rich, but they had each other. He found his calling at an early age when he heard a disc jockey at a local radio station introducing music and he was hooked. It wasn’t until many years later that I met Harry through some mutual friends. I was drawn to him right away because he had an infectious smile and southern drawl that he acquired as a child. Despite his travels around the country, he never lost either of these things.

Let me try to explain to you why everyone needs…a friend like Harry. Harry Nelson worked in radio pretty much his entire adult life. He excelled in huge markets such as San Fransisco, New York, Denver, and Boston, but it was a small station in Maine that made him finally feel at home. He settled there and never left. Married once, but never having children, Harry was a legend in the radio world, but unknown to the rest of the world. He was an unassuming and humble man who would do anything for his friends. Friends that scattered the country and became his family. If you knew Harry, you loved Harry…it was simple as that.

Harry’s health started to deteriorate when he hit his mid 60s, but he never lost his zest for life, or those who he shared it with. I lived pretty close to Harry, so I started going to visit more often and helping out in small ways to make things more comfortable for him. He lived alone with his beloved cats, but his family of friends called him constantly. That mass of friends was there for Harry because he was always there for them.

There was no stress or drama when you were around Harry. His positivity could brighten a room and I never recall him saying a disparaging word about anyone. He greeted everyone with that loud booming, “Hey Buddddd”. We would often go for drives and grab a bite to eat, and Harry was ever so appreciative. Little did he know that it was I who appreciated his stories and friendship. Harry Nelson lived his best life despite that hand that he was dealt at birth. He fought for what he wanted and worked hard to achieve it. He once asked me to grab a folder from an old bureau and I came across dozens of photographs of Harry standing with the likes of Tom Petty, Dwight Yoakam, and other music industry stars. They weren’t framed and hanging from his walls…they were collecting dust in a yellow file folder. That was Harry Nelson, humble, unassuming, and a champions for others.

Harry made some careers take off in the music world, but he never took credit for that. Instead, he gave that credit to the artists. A more selfless and kind man you’d be hard pressed to find. The picture that accompanies this blog is one of my favorites for two reasons…Harry loved to visit my family at the campground we stay at in the summer, and the other person in the picture is my actual best friend of well over 50 years, Jim Fahey. Those friendships were and are so important to me because I am in search of quality, not quantity when it comes to friends.

Harry Nelson left this world almost two years ago. I still miss my friend and there are so many others out there who do the same. He impacted so many lives and asked for nothing in return. He simply wanted you to be nice to him as he was always nice to you! That is why everyone needs…a friend like Harry. I sure hope you have one or find one at some point.

stool2

A War Worth Fighting

Is the War on Drugs worth fighting? That question has been asked many time by many people. I am not a subject matter expert, but I did spend 30 years witnessing the ravages of drug abuse and addiction while working as a police officer. I also spent over 5 years working specifically on drug crimes while serving as an agent for the Maine Drug Enforcement Agency. I dare say that the only subject matter experts are those who have lost everything because of their addiction. You could also add the surviving family members who lost a son, daughter, grandchild, or other relative to a fatal overdose. There is no doubt that drugs kill, but our overall approach to dealing with the drug epidemic is only exasperating the problem. Many states have started to decriminalize the use and possession of small amounts of illicit drugs such as Heroin and Cocaine. When the “Government” legalizes something, what message does that send to our kids and other impressionable citizens? It tells them that it must be okay…this started with the legalization of Marijuana for “medicinal purposes”, which was clearly just the inroad to ultimate legalization. Oh, look how far we’ve come with that.

The War on Drugs should be fought to preserve our country, it can be fought using a basic premise that I will soon explain, and it must be fought if we truly care about our citizens. Addiction is all encompassing…you need that drug or substance to get through the day. The withdrawals are agonizing, but more often than not they will only make you want to die instead of actually killing you. The drug world is a nasty world to live in. It brings out the worst in people and is never pretty. Don’t believe me, check this out.

https://www.methproject.org/answers/will-using-meth-change-how-i-look.html#Mug-Shot-Match-Up

The drug trade is a business, plain and simple. Those selling the drugs are doing it purely for profit, or to support their own addiction. Neither is good, but a distinction should be made between the two. Like any war, the War on Drugs must be fought on many fronts. A one-sided approach will do little to stem the flow of drugs into our streets, protect our citizens from fatal overdoses, or reduce the demand for the now often fatal poison. We will never eliminate all illegal drugs, but we can sure do a lot better than we are now. You have to have the want, the will, and the where with all to make a difference before a difference can be made.

I believe that the stool method is a great starting point when it comes to combatting the drug crisis. A stool has three legs and those legs need to be equal ,or the stool will wobble or fall over. Each leg on the War on Drugs stool would have a different, yet equally important component.

Leg #1 – Prevention…we need to realistically educate our youth to the dangers of using drugs (even once) because an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. We fall well short here, but there is sure room for improvement!!! DARE is a great program, but it educates the wrong students. Most kids in 3rd and 4th grade don’t even know what drugs are, but what realistic education is there for kids entering middle or high school?

Leg #2 – Enforcement…we need to hold people accountable for their actions. Merely accepting drug addiction as a “disease” does nothing to entice those addicted to put the work in to get and remain clean and sober. We need to demonize illegal drugs and those selling them to our kids, regardless of their race, creed, religion, or background. We as a society have become soft on crime. We have turned into a “Not my fault” country and we’re quick to blame someone or something else for our wrongdoing. Without accountability, there is no incentive to stop bad behavior or actions. People are dying daily and the first step towards solving a problem is admitting you have one. We need to support law enforcement and incarcerate criminals instead of coddling them.

Leg #3 – Rehabilitation…those addicted to drugs should have a pathways to rehabilitation which will offer them an opportunity to get sober. Life is all about opportunity and seizing it. Those addicted need to put in the work and have the want to stay sober. Nobody can do that for them. If they fail, perhaps they get another chance? If they continuously fail, when does personal responsibility kick in? When do they go to jail? When do we as a society protect them from themselves because they clearly can’t do it on their own. More importantly, when do we protect us from them?

These are all tough questions and the answers are plentiful, but we need to start having these conversations. Close to 100,000 citizens died from drug overdoses in the US in 2022. If this isn’t reason enough to make serious changes…what is?

Port

We did this…

We did this to ourselves over the course of a few short years. This photo could have been taken in Portland, Oregon or Portland, Maine…it was the latter. It really doesn’t matter because scenes such as this one are commonplace in any decent sized “Progressive” city. How did we get here? How did homelessness and filth overtake our once proud and clean cities? We as a collective society have allowed it to happen and it may be too late to turn things around.

I was a statewide drug agent in the early 2000’s and I was shocked when I realized the extent of the drug problem during that time period. Heroin was killing people, but Fentanyl had not entered the drug pipeline yet. I had been a police officer for 13 years when I started investigating drug cases in the Portland, Maine area. I saw firsthand the evil grip of addiction as well as the need for greed by drug dealers who sold purely for profit. It is a dirty business, but it is a business nonetheless. I had one simple goal while fighting the war on drugs for over 5 years…keep the drug trade underground and out of view of the law abiding citizens and children. I tried to offer help for those addicted and a jail cell for those who strictly dealt to make money.

Our criminal justice system has eroded in many ways since then. Lawmakers have decriminalized the possession of specific drugs, marijuana has become a tax producing commodity, criminal activity has become acceptable and rarely prosecuted, and the laws and foundational principals that this country were founded on have been gutted and redefined. We have done this to ourselves.

I am not picking a side politically because I am not a fan of many, if any politicians. Our legislative bodies are the law making branch of government and they dictate the rules and policies that govern our behavior. Laws are only meaningful if they are adhered to and prosecuted fairly and across the board. We have laws on the books, but there seems to be no will to enforce them. We excuse bad and criminal behavior and coddle those committing it. When there are no consequences for bad actions, those committing them have no need or incentive to stop. This simple premise starts when we are children and hopefully it is ingrained in us when we reach adulthood. Everything is somebody else’s fault now and personal responsibility has been thrown out the window.

I empathize with the homeless, but we must ask ourselves how and why it has become so prevalent in recent years. Because we allow it…that’s why. We let squatters put up tents wherever they want and we leave them there for fear of stigmatizing them. We allow open air drug markets because we decided to treat those possessing and using illegal drugs as patients with a medical issue instead of criminals who should be offered rehabilitation options. The police have had their hands tied, the prosecutors dismiss or diminish criminal cases regularly, and only the worst of the worst are held in a jail or prison for any period of time. We the people have allowed this to happen because we elect the people who make these laws. We become complacent and don’t actively participate in the “process” because in most cases we live in a bubble protected from the insanity around us.

I believe there are good intentions that lead to terrible consequences. We have seriously mentally ill people walking the streets because individual choice has superseded public safety. We as a society don’t want to label people, upset people, or challenge people…so innocent people get hurt or killed. We need to find a balance between compassion and enabling. We need to stop blaming others for the state of our country and start asking what we can do to change it. We need to accept the fact that there are some really bad and dangerous people walking the streets who should be behind bars. How about we provide people with the opportunity to turn their lives around while also holding them accountable for their actions?

We did this…period. We allowed the degradation of our values and principals while trying to be more understanding of those in need of help. Those who suffer the most are the law abiding citizens who become victims of those who in many cases shouldn’t be walking the streets in the first place. We have become fearful and hesitant to speak our mind because others are quick to label or attack us. Our silence and inaction only perpetuates the growing problem, which has no end or solution in sight. This is not leadership…this is chaos and the decay of our country.